16 December 2011

BLOG MUSINGS

No pictures. I've been thinking about my blog a lot lately, coming to terms with the cold weather, relaxing on my days off. It's getting more and more difficult to take pictures because of changes in weather, schedules, and what not. 

I'm working so much at my less than desirable minimum wage job because I'm saving up my money for something really special. So special that I don't want to say anything about it until it happens. It's like a wish. If you dream and dream and wish for something, and you tell people, it's possible it won't come true. I don't want that to happen, so I'm being very secretive.

But all this working late nights and over time is cutting into my blog. I sleep in, which I hate, and I don't get anything done. Mostly I'm just worn down. This week I was so tired I couldn't bear the idea of getting up early to some how take photos in the rain. And it was raining. Hence no more photos this week.

I'm working on taking pictures inside though. Working on it.

But I've been thinking all about my style, and what I want it to grow and change into. The beauty of fashion is that all you have to do is make a solid commitment to it, say "I do" and whatever you want will materialize because all of the sudden you will be it. I always wanted to be more feminine when I was in high school; looking up to the girls who wore dresses while I was wearing well put together outfits of jeans and sweatshirts. I'm a firm believer in the doer; the setting your mind to it; being determined. I realized one day that I didn't have to admire anyone, I could be those that I admired. And I ended up where I am now, no pants in my closet.

So what I want to say I do to is more pants. More blazers. More menswear. Less make up. More heels. Less feminine. More androgynous. And I will do what I want. Be who I want to be. Even if that person is ever in flux.

Don't know if this is coherent or not,

Rachel

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